Matt here.
Now that the new year has started and things have temporarily slowed town, I've been able to reflect on the previous year and have drawn some conclusions. 2019 was the most successful years of my life, and it was also one of the most challenging ones. Between working 50 hours a week at my full time job, wedding photography, personal issues, and deciding to take a break from music to re-prioritize my time, not only was proper rest and free time at a premium, I also started suffering from an existential crisis.
I do my own photography too!
It was a gradual change. Over time my inner dialogue became more and more negative. Situations that I would normally approach with calm reserve I was then approaching with begrudging reluctance and pessimism. I began isolating myself from people and keeping them at arm's length, and was spending far too much time dwelling on what was instead of what I could be doing. I felt a distinct and deep down lack.
I began looking at my life and comparing it to the lives of others and started asking myself questions like who am I? What am I doing with my time? Is what I’m doing really worth it? And the more that I isolated myself and dwelled on these things, the worse it got.
Things all came to a head for me at the end of the year when Jess and I were enjoying some time off together during the holidays. I am normally not one to talk about my feelings, but I began opening up to her about the difficult time I was having and expressing my general discontent and unhappiness. Despite the fact that she knows me well enough to see these changes in me from a mile away, it was uncomfortable and scary to vocalize them and put them out in the open. Being honest with yourself often is.
Taken in my favorite spot in Reykjavik, Iceland
All the while, YouTube playing in the background on our TV and a video about minimalism started playing in the background. Bit by bit it started to grab my attention and before I knew it I had fallen silent and become totally engrossed in what this person had to say. The more that I watched the more calm I became and the pieces started to fall into place - I am a minimalist.
Minimalism can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people, but what it really comes down to is living in a simple way where you are mindful of what you spend your time and money on. This can be both a literal and an abstract practice.
I already have a habit of taking what is in front of me and breaking it down to its most simple and basic form, seeking function instead of flare. Clothes are a great example - I don’t particularly care about fashion trends or what is popular, and as a result have a humble wardrobe that is comfortable, simple, and practical. Overall, I tend to gravitate towards things that are simple and straightforward, and if they are not, I make them simple and straightforward.
So while all of this was going through my head, I began to realize that I had complicated my life and turned away from things that brought value to it. I had lost sight of the key components and values in my life in all of the busyness that tends to surround me. I had become lazy with myself and let the entropy that chaos tends to bring creep into everything that I was doing.
Upon realizing that, I made some firm decisions that evening.
No more comparing myself to other people or other situations. I, in fact, do NOT lack, I am happy with “less”.
From that point onward I was going to start scheduling my time. Whether it's for business, work, relationship, or personal, everything gets scheduled in. This way I am not only putting time towards my career and wife, but I was also putting time towards myself
To de-clutter my life, both literally and metaphorically, only keep things that add value to my life and avoid “stuff”
Live in a way that I am happy with, not strictly in a way that is pleasing to others.
Can you tell that I like black & white photography?
The change in me and in my life since that night has been steady and positive, and I have already made great strides in setting up my life in such a way that it is the life that I truly want. My time is now properly divided and focused on my wife, our business, our family of furry creatures, and to my own pursuits and interests. It’s amazing how much scheduling my time has helped me out. While I still have the same amount that I’ve always had, it feels like I have more of it.
I’m writing music again, which has done wonders to my mood. I am a creative person, and I need to create even if it’s only for myself. I am in the process of writing my first solo album and will be recording and releasing it myself. This is something that I see myself doing for the rest of my life.
Living minimally may not be for everyone, I totally get that, but I do think that many people would benefit from a little decluttering in their lives. Seek out things and people to add to your life that add value and happiness, and avoid the things that are cheap and mediocre. Your life is made up of exactly what you put into it, so be more mindful of what you allow into it.
People tend to view living with less as living with lack. That’s not the point of minimalism, it’s about value. not lack. If you find yourself in a situation where you are unhappy because of how much you have downsized, you are doing it wrong and really need to be honest with yourself about what you consider essential and valuable in making yourself happy.
I’m excited about getting back onto my path, and I’m excited about how living simply with less will actually enable me to do more with my life.
